Me and my parents went to Dubai last week for my half term break. I actually just came back. While i was there, i met someone who said something to me and it got to me dearly. You might say its really cliche or cheesy but he was right. "Life's too short to be upset. If someone wants to leave let them. Never chase anyone. Never make an effort if youre the only one trying. Depend on yourself." and he also said this " لا تبحث عن شيئ، لا تطلب مساعدة من " احد او اهـتمام، لا تفكر في شخص، لاتدخل الى السرير و انت غير مستعد للنوم."
because diary, at the end of the day all you have is yourself. That was some sort of a wake up call for me. I had to get over Rakan, i had to move on. He was never mine and never will be. I'm probably here dwelling over him while he's having the time of his life wherever he may be. I'll still worry. A part of me will always think of him, always worry about him and miss him, but its okay i'll just have to hide him deep within me, in a place that's too dark to look around, a place i want to never open up to someone about. My soul grew tired of waiting and hoping, so for now, i must let him go.
Bebe has finally gotten off my case and thank god for that. When we go back home, i have one of those school meetings again, like the one i officially met Rakan in. I cant believe its been 2 years since we officially started talking, not the awkward encounter at Arwa's house 3 years ago. It took me less than a year to fall for him and a year and a half to try and get over him.
You may ask why didn't you ask arwa where he is? she might know. Truth is i did and she was more clueless than me, all she said was "meera he's my second cousin, we're not that close. i'm sorry i cant help you" after a while of nagging her and her giving me the same response i gave up, but that was 6 months ago.
I keep telling myself i want to move on but i cant. i dont know why, i just really cant. At least i know he's alright or else Arwa would tell me,wouldn't she?
No! No! Think positive Meera, positive.
Anyway, i gotta go diary, its my last night in Dubai so i'm going out for some shopping, the only thing that can take my mind off of things...
By the way diary, incase you were wondering, i never took off the necklace he gave me, i couldn't. It was the only thing i had left that was evidence that he even existed.
The "i'll miss you"note, the note i tore up months ago and since he blocked me off every social networking site i literally had no contact with him and arwa stopped mentioning his name in front of me the same day i stopped nagging her to find out where he was. So this necklace holds a piece of my heart, i piece of my heart that i am not willing to let go of...
because diary, at the end of the day all you have is yourself. That was some sort of a wake up call for me. I had to get over Rakan, i had to move on. He was never mine and never will be. I'm probably here dwelling over him while he's having the time of his life wherever he may be. I'll still worry. A part of me will always think of him, always worry about him and miss him, but its okay i'll just have to hide him deep within me, in a place that's too dark to look around, a place i want to never open up to someone about. My soul grew tired of waiting and hoping, so for now, i must let him go.
Bebe has finally gotten off my case and thank god for that. When we go back home, i have one of those school meetings again, like the one i officially met Rakan in. I cant believe its been 2 years since we officially started talking, not the awkward encounter at Arwa's house 3 years ago. It took me less than a year to fall for him and a year and a half to try and get over him.
You may ask why didn't you ask arwa where he is? she might know. Truth is i did and she was more clueless than me, all she said was "meera he's my second cousin, we're not that close. i'm sorry i cant help you" after a while of nagging her and her giving me the same response i gave up, but that was 6 months ago.
I keep telling myself i want to move on but i cant. i dont know why, i just really cant. At least i know he's alright or else Arwa would tell me,wouldn't she?
No! No! Think positive Meera, positive.
Anyway, i gotta go diary, its my last night in Dubai so i'm going out for some shopping, the only thing that can take my mind off of things...
By the way diary, incase you were wondering, i never took off the necklace he gave me, i couldn't. It was the only thing i had left that was evidence that he even existed.
The "i'll miss you"note, the note i tore up months ago and since he blocked me off every social networking site i literally had no contact with him and arwa stopped mentioning his name in front of me the same day i stopped nagging her to find out where he was. So this necklace holds a piece of my heart, i piece of my heart that i am not willing to let go of...
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