chapter 9

Dear Diary, 
                   i may be tied up in this hell hole, but i'm happy here. I don't have to worry about Bebe. I feel at peace...

on the phone to rakan

me: alo?

rakan: meera where have you disappeared to?

me: u-umm i- um 

rakan: meera whats that beeping sound?

me: uummm. rakan i-uum, im at the hospital, but im better now so dont worry

rakan: which hospital?

me: why?

rakan: meera which hospital? (i could hear the anger rising within him)

me: rakan why?

rakan: meera. which hospital?! (at this point he screamed at me and i jumped from his reaction)

me: ****** hospital

rakan: give me 15 minutes.

me: rakan no

all i could hear was the sound the beeping sound indicating the phone call ended. 

back in the room...

suddenly i heard a really fast bleeping sound and i didn't know where it was coming from. i looked to my left and saw the heart monitor beating rapidly. At that moment i put my hand to my heart, it felt like it was about to escape. 

Diary, its gonna be the first time i actually see rakan, like actually sit together, and and and well say something other than "hey, nice meeting you". The fact that he just screamed at me doesn't make it any better. saying i'm terrified and nervous would be an understatement. 

I tried getting my mind off of it but there was no use, just as i was about to turn on the tv, my door opened and rakan scurried in. 

rakan: meera... (i could see worry swimming in his beautiful brown eyes)

i guess he saw my soul flutter at the sight of him, because a cheeky grin got plastered on his face as he made his way to my side.

meera: u-um i-um  wh-what are you doing here? (yup i got tongue tied)

this boy could literally take my breath away.  

I love the way he gets wrinkles in the corner of his eyes every time he smiles.
i love the way his laugh automatically makes my heart pounce.
i love that scruffy look he has.
i love his defined jaw line.
i love his husky voice and how every time i hear it, i get lost in my own little world.
i love how he says my name, and how he cares. 
i even love his traditional khaleeji nose.
Most of all i love his soul and how he was so different, how he could captivate reality and how optimistic he was, how he always saw the good in people and turned their problems into his. 

To me this boy meant perfection, and he was all i wanted. He was the only person my heart let in and i didnt even know why. 


could it be? could i really be falling for him this easily? isnt it too soon? do i even believe in love at first sight?

rakan's mere chuckles dragged me out of my thoughts.
He grabbed the chair next to my bed and moved it closer to me and sat down.

we just gazed at each other, dumbfounded. 
He had beautiful eyes. The kind you could get lost in. The kind that would escape pictures. The kind that could absorb your soul and i guess they took me away. 

i quickly got back to reality and remembered that i was mad at him for 
1) screaming at me
2)coming to the hospital without asking (i mean what if my mum was here?)
3)for ignoring my question

me: ra-rakan. how did they let you in?

rakan: i told them i was your brother. 
           meera? are you upset? (i guess he sensed my irritation) 

after he said that, he inched his hand next to mine, and just as his hand touched mine for the first time, i froze and my face turned into all the different shades of pink and red that you could imagine. My insides fluttered, and once again, this boy made butterflies take over as he took my breath away for the second time in less than 30 minutes.

Diary, i guess i really am falling for him....

"i don't know how to answer. i know what i think, but words in the head are like voices underwater. they are distorted."